Wednesday, July 29, 2009
I long to feel you move in my tummy,
To hear your heart beat,
I yearn see your face,
My arms ache to hold you,
And wrap you with love
Only a mother could give.
And a lifetime to share.
When are you coming, baby?
We’ve been waiting for you.
The above poem is my personal composition. My desire and aspiration to be a mommy drive me to write this. It's been three long years my husband and I have been waiting for our own child. Our life as married couple is empty. I'm pretty sure kids' laughter and giggles and even their horrible cries are but melodies to us.
Credits:
Photos taken from Photobucket
Freebie Quick Page from:
http://scrapznbitz.blogspot.com
I do agree that infertility sucks. Makes me ask: “Why me?” And if you haven’t experienced it, you will never understand it. Do you how I feel every time an acquaintance ask my husband how many siblings we have? Do you know how I feel every time I see kids playing with their mom and dad? Do you know how inadequate I feel during family gatherings when my in-laws have hands full of kids and I have none? I feel awful and very sad whenever I see my husband’s envious face every time he looks at toddler. It tears me to my guts. Do you know what I think and feel every time I see or hear from the news of abandoned kids? Of kids being aborted? Of malnourished and uneducated kids because their parents could not afford to buy them food or send them to school?
Of all people, why me? Why can’t we have our own kids?
To make matters worse, I was already in my 30 when I got married. My husband and I accidentally learned of my condition when we went to an OBGyne. That was the time I learned I am technically infertile. I belonged to that category since I have an irregular menstruation. Ovulating, in my case, is unpredictable. Timing is a contributory aspect since we only meet every 3-5 months. His work place is somewhere in the northern part of my country while I am with my parents somewhere in the south. Separation with my husband due to our work location makes Fertility treatment and timing impossible.
We are earning enough to support a family. I was earning well before I learned of this awful condition. I had my job and own shop which I left just to be with my husband. I moved here near the air base with him.
Far different from the one I loved and used to. Way back home, I work tirelessly meeting the demands of my clients. I made gowns for them. I love going places, meeting clients and going to the venue of their wedding and reception. I had my staff with me. I was in my own shop surrounded by mannequins, gowns, magazines, fabrics n scraps, machines… I could go on and on. When I start my day, I hardly notice time pass by. It’s like the clock has been chasing me and the next I know it’s dark already. I was a busy person. Always on the go.
This is my life now. And this infertility and fertility treatment thoughts are becoming an everyday routine. It becomes part of my life now.
Blogging gives me a relief. Somehow it unleashes many of my emotions and feelings unspoken and unheard of. I draw strength from the many women struggling to keep their sanity in face of infertility.
We have already spent so much on this fertility treatment. I hope this Puregon injectable will succeed. I pray to God to hear the pleading of our hearts. May He be merciful to me and my husband. We really love to have our very own children.
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Day 2- injecting 75iu of puregon
I sent SMS to my hubby asking him to be home by 10:30 because I need my injection exactly 11:00 this morning. When he arrived he said he’s excited to do it. He even made a funny face. LOL. I was laughing at him so much that my belly is jiggling. Well, that made me feel so relaxed and less scared. He got the Puregon kit from the refrigerator. Put on new needle and set it at 75iu. I rubbed cotton with alcohol on the area which will be injected and held my belly then applied a little pressure. Then he injected it on the left side of my belly. We both started to count 1-10. Perhaps, he was scared too he didn’t notice he was slowly withdrawing the needle when we were still at count 3. I held his hand steady. And before I knew it, the count is over. I rubbed cotton in the punctured area. And we both started to laugh again. Later, we hugged. Oh, my hubby has his way of making me feel comfortable.
Maybe he was scared as I am. He's not a nurse so it's not everyday that he deals with needles and injections. However, one of us have to show bravery. and he did well. Incredibly, he brave the needle and made it. After that, he said he wants to sleep. Perhaps, his adrenalin is down the drainage now! LOL.
1. Processed foods – refined white flour, white rice, sugars, pastries and all of the processed prepackaged foods where the fiber has been removed.
2. Foods high in hydrogenated and animal fats – cheese, ice cream, fatty meats, whole milk and snacks like chips and pizza.
3. High sugar, caffeine and non-nutritional drinks – alcohol, coffee, colas and fruit juice (since the fiber has been removed).
Bowel problems can also be a symptom of diseases, such as metabolism and nervous system conditions or irritable bowel syndrome. Here are all the main causes of constipation problems.
* Lack of exercise
* Stress and tension
* Drugs and Medications
* Too little fiber in the diet
* Not drinking enough water
* Disrupted routine (as when traveling
* Intentionally holding back (common in children)
Last week has been quite a hell for my “ass”. LOL. I have frequent constipation. I’m experiencing hard, compacted stools that are difficult and painful to pass. This is so unusual of me. I talked to my doc about it and she said it’s not a problem that would complicate with my fertility treatment as long as I’m not bleeding due to it. She prescribed me Ultraproct, a suppository. I used one after defecating this morning.
Aside from lack of water intake, what are other factors that lead to constipation? Hmmnn…
Again, I turned to the net to look for answers. Here’s what I got.
The common causes of constipation are:
- Not enough fiber in the diet - The American Dietetic Association recommends 20 to 35 grams of fiber each day. Examples of fiber-rich foods are unprocessed wheat bran, unrefined breakfast cereals, fresh fruits (except bananas), dried fruits, vegetables (except potatoes), grainy breads and legumes.
- Not enough liquid - Liquids like water and juice add fluid to the colon and bulk to stools, making movements softer and easier to pass. Recommended daily consumption of liquid is eight, eight-ounce glasses (totaling 64 ounces) per day.
- Lack of exercise
- Medications - Some medications that can cause constipation are: analgesics (Codeine, Demerol, Perocdan), antacids (Maalox, Mylanta), anticholingerics (Donnatal), anticonvulsants (Dilantin), anti-depressants (Tricyclics), Beta-blockers (Inderal, Tenormin) iron and calcium supplements, pain medications, antispasmodics and diuretics.
- Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS) - IBS is a common condition marked by chronic or occasional diarrhea, alternating with constipation and accompanied by straining and abdominal cramps. (see Health Profile: IRRITABLE BOWEL SYNDROME)
- Lifestyle changes, such as pregnancy, aging and traveling
- Laxative abuse - A laxative is a food or chemical substance that acts to loosen the bowels by softening and increasing the bulk of bowel contents, increasing the amount of water in the colon and lubricating the intestinal walls. Over time, laxatives can damage nerve cells in the colon and interfere with the colon's natural ability to contract.
- Ignoring the urge to have a bowel movement
- Diseases such as multiple sclerosis, Parkinson's disease, chronic idiopathic intestinal pseudo-obstruction, stroke, spinal cord injuries, diabetes, under-active and over-active thyroid gland, uremia (excess urine waste product), amyloidosis (accumulation in the tissues/organs of amyloid), lupus, scleroderma (an autoimmune disorder that affects the tissues/organs), colorectal cancer, depression, colon tumors, diverticulosis and Hirschsprung's disease.
Treatment of Constipation
Most cases of constipation respond to conservative treatment such as dietary and lifestyle changes or mild laxatives.
Dietary changes include getting enough of the recommended daily amount of fiber (20 to 35 grams), drinking 64 ounces of water or juice a day, and limiting foods that have little or no fiber, such as ice cream, cheese, meat and processed foods.
Lifestyle changes consist of exercising, reserving enough time to have a bowel movement and having a bowel movement when needed.
Laxatives may be recommended if the above changes did not help the constipation.
There are four types of laxatives - bulk-forming, stimulant, lubricant and saline. Bulk-forming laxatives, such as Metamucil, Citrucel and Serutan increase the volume of feces, making them softer and easier to pass. Stimulant laxatives, such as Correctol, Ex-Lax, Dulcolax, Purge, Feen-A-Mint and Senokot stimulate the intestinal wall to contract. Lubricant laxatives, such as mineral oil, soften the stool so it is easier to pass. Saline laxatives, such as Milk of Magnesia, Citrate of Magnesia and Haley's M-O, increase the concentration of salts within the feces.
Source:
http://www.healthscout.com/
